By Ed Templeton
The Palais de Tokyo Demos
September 28, 2002
We did a couple of Emerica demos (put on by the local skateboard distributor V7) inside one of the huge galleries of an art museum called the Palais de Tokyo. There was nothing on the walls, they were all just perfectly white with a nice smooth floor—kind of too slippery, actually.
There were several rental objects for us to skate, like a hip, a funbox with a bar on top, quartepipes—even a seven-stair handrail. There were two different demos, each one with two or three hundred people—they were pretty big. We put bunch of holes in the walls with flying boards, but the owners didn’t really get pissed—I think they were ready for it. Nothing unusual happened, just music (CDs playing) and skating—it was good, no one got hurt, no one flipped-out or anything. The kids were all psyched. I went outside afterward and signed some autographs.
The EssentialDisturbance Art Show
Palais de Tokyo
October 3—November 10, 2002
I spent a month total in Europe. I was there for two weeks before the Emerica guys came out for the demo. They had some free time, so they went out skating a lot, but I spent all of my time, besides the demo, working on my art show, The Essential Disturbance, which opened the night after the demo in a different room of the Palais de Tokyo.
Basically, there were assistants there who helped me paint the whole room a light green color—it was a nice green, like a Martha Stewart green. I painted clouds all over the walls with watery paint so it would drip, then I hung up about three hundred and sixty paintings and photographs—stuff that I’ve had for a long time. The Palais de Tokyo had it shipped it over. I had to pack it all, though—it’s a pain in the ass, Deanna helped me—she bubble-wrapped everything. I put it all in boxes, then that was packed inside a crate for shipping.
The show went good, there were no problems—everything turned out perfect. We got all of the art up, about five hundred people came out and it was a really big hit. In fact, they extended the show for a week. A lot of skaters were there, but it was more just regular people in suits, and stuff—art people—which is kind of weird for me, just being a skater and seeing these art guys talking about art. I do it [art], but I don’t really care to talk about it, or anything. The art guys didn’t really talk to me, they stayed away from me—I’m too dirty.
The Palais de Tokyo also curated an all-color 104-page soft cover book published in Italy called The Golden Age Of Neglect. It’s all photographs—there are no paintings in it. It mostly documents my life as a skateboarder and the people around me who are skateboarders. It includes some personal photographs, some skateboarding tour-type photos and just photos in general. It’s basically just a big selection of photos that I like.
Barcelona Filming Missions
Barcelona was good—we stayed two weeks there on a filming trip. It’s the best town ever for skating, just because, for some reason, the architecture style always involves banks—not money banks, but banks you can skate. Everywhere you look, there’s a bank—it’s a GSD wonderland. There’s so many banks. On top of that, no one anywhere cares that you skate. You can just skate any place you want—no one freaks out. I’ve been to Barcelona twice—two months apart—and I saw it get a little worse in just a couple of months. It’s turning into a skate mecca. I think so many skaters are going there that people are going to start getting pissed. Barcelona is getting coverage everywhere. It’s one of the best cities in the world for skateboarding—it’s incredible. That’s why it was so good, we would just skate different stuff all day—totally different spots. You don’t have to worry about having a generator or going somewhere at 2:00 in the morning, you can just do it all right in the daytime, then have dinner and go to bed. You don’t have to stay up all late for everything—even though we did end up staying up late every night.
We had a good group of people, cuz everyone skates different stuff. Reynolds was destroying everything, cuz he’s really good. When he gets to a spot, all he has to do is just pick a couple of tricks out of the twenty-five he can do there, whereas I have to try to find the one trick I can do. Reynolds would go and skate a gap or some stairs. I’d watch him, then they would watch me doing some other stuff on banks later. There was this great bank spot we were shown, it’s the most epic spot ever—just banks with ledges on top all in a downhill motion. Herman ate shit on a noseblunt slide down the machine gun rail and almost killed himself. But, aside from that, he was rippin’. Ellington was ripping, too. He had this trick he wanted to do down the Big Four—a switch backside flip. He kept going back to get it. Spanky was hurt the whole trip—he had a bruised heel, or something, so he was kind of just relaxing. Tosh was rippin’—he was sort of a loser. He was calling everyone a loser. That was his favorite word of the whole trip—he said "loser" about eight thousand times. Aside from that, and talking about how good HB is, he was ripping. HB pride was on high alert. I like when Tosh frontside shoved the crazy wave bar spot.
The Hotel Room Riot
I was sort of involved with Spanky and Herman trashing their hotel room, which was bad. I couldn’t reach them on the phone, so I finally went down to their room and found out they had cut their phone line. I was like, "How in hell did you cut your phone line?" and Spanky was like, "Well, I was going around the room cutting stuff with the scissors and I was messing around pretending I was going to cut the phone line, then it just happened." I walked in there and their room was all fucked-up. It was in general disarray with Pringles chips all on the floor. I was hanging-out and realized that almost everything in the room was cut in half with a pair of scissors—including their phone line.
They had this Pringles can by the bathroom and they kept telling me to pick it up, like, "Check it out! You should pick up the Pringles can!" So, I picked it up—it was kind of sketchy already—and they told me that Herman had taken a crap in the Pringles can and put the lid back on. So, instead of opening it, I just slammed it onto the desktop so all the crap would go from the bottom of the can up to the top where the lid was. Then I opened it so the crap was sticking out the front and chased everyone around the room with it. Everyone was freaking out. I ended up winging it out the window, but I kept holding the can so the crap would fling out powerfully straight downstairs through a grate into a power room. There were some little remnant craps hanging on the side of the can after I did that, which I slapped on Herman’s leg. He freaked out. He was up on the window, fell off and sacked the table. He put his foot on the table sideways and knocked it over, sacked it and hurt his knee or foot. He was freaking out, holding his balls, bumming. He was trying to attack me and I had to pick up a chair like a lion tamer to hold him back. I was poking him away with the chair. Here’s a thirty year-old dude trying to fight off a sixteen year-old.
Herman then ran over to sit down on Spanky’s bed and Spanky was flipping out, because he didn’t want the shit getting on his bed. So, he punched Herman in the back and Herman wanted to fight him for a second. Then Herman got up and went to the bathroom to wash it off. Spanky realized that a little nugget of the shit had flown onto his grip tape during all the mayhem. I didn’t think it was shit, cuz I smelled it and it didn’t smell bad, but then I took it into the bathroom and smooshed it a little bit with a piece of trash and all this smell came out of it. It’s like there was this smell was just waiting to come out. Then I stepped on this big standing lamp and it smashed against the wall and broke the glass. So, there was glass and potato chips everywhere, the phone line and everything else in the room—like papers and magazines—was cut in half by scissors and Herman had shit on him and was bumming, cuz he just sacked the table. Then I found this black thing on the ground. I didn’t know what it was, but I put it on Spanky’s bed cuz he’s such a freak about getting crap on it. I said, "Aw, man! There’s crap on your bed!" He was like, "No way! Fuck!" I was like, "I’m not sure, man. You’ve got to smell it!" So, he went to smell it and I smashed his head into it—but, it wasn’t really crap.
We had lots of fun going to eat and going on little sightseeing adventures. Spanky saw someone get pickpocketed, but didn’t even tell them. There was this lady walking with a backpack, and a kid walked up behind her. At first, Spanky thought that it was a kid walkng up to his mother. Then he realized that the kid took something out of the backpack and ran off. All of it happened so quickly, that Spanky didn’t even immediately realize what was going on. It was a crowded street and the kid took off down an alley. When Spanky told me this story, I asked him, "Did you tell the lady that she had just been pickpocketed?" He said, "No, we just kept walking." Harsh.